the-katie-diary: time for hot shower sex minus the sex
jpgay: me flirting: if you were a cheeto you’d be a hot cheeto
sunshineface0014: assbutt-in-the-garrison: I need my glasses to find my glasses do you see my problem You can’t even see your problem
whiskey-memories: bras are so expensive like i didn’t choose the boob life the boob life chose me
potatoandotherwise: prettylittledwighthoustonlover: potatoandotherwise: BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN, MADONNA, WAY BEFORE NIRVANA, THERE WAS U2 AND BLONDIE, AND MUSIC STILL ON MTV, HER TWO KIDS IN HIGH SCHOOL TELL HER THAT SHE’S UNCOOL BUT SHE’S STILL PRETTY PREOCCUPIED WITH You were waiting for this weren’t you I waited my entire Tumblr career for this.
aesthetic-dissonance: sagihairius: My mom just informed me that my first word was “quote” so I’m going to make sure my last word before I die will be “unquote” you have been blessed with a rare and epic opportunity
hellolxsa: i want a late night adventure. i want someone to call me up and say, “i’m outside. let’s go do something!” i want to go out late at night in my pj’s and my hair all tied up. maybe drive around. go to a park and just swing on the swings. maybe sit in the grass and watch the stars or maybe go to a 24 hour food place and pig out. i just want a late night adventure with people i like to...
randomstuff134: sodamnrelatable: take a moment to realize you have never seen your face in person, just reflections and pictures some scientists agree that if you saw a clone of yourself, you wouldn’t recognise it as you, because our idea of what we look like is so different from what we actually look like
Police: where do you live?
Me: with my parents
Police: where do your parents live?
Me: with me
Police: where do you all live?
Police: where is your house?
Me: next to my neighbors house
Police: where do your neighbors live?
Me: if i tell you, you wont believe me
Police: tell me
Me: next to my house
casualfangirling: 538rqaeb98gh434398jvgi: people who do math homework in pen are fearless ppl with urls like urs are the real fearless ones
i swear i get uglier everyday
wild-lion: just because i hate me doesnt mean you can
alexisturtle: 10000bc: since abercrombie an fitch destroys its unsold clothes and wont donate bc poor people wearing their clothes gives them a bad image i say everyone should donate as much abercrombie and fitch brand clothing that you have to homeless shelters so you can simultaneously piss off a shitty company and help those in need why doesn’t this have more notes?
apatheticghost: my dad just yelled “IT SOUNDS LIKE YOURE MAKING OUT WITH SOMEONE YOU BETTER NOT HAVE A BOY IN THERE”
exordi-um: Omg so I took this picture of my friends before prom And then I noticed this girl in the background She’s just like “Oh you have a date huh? Well I could have had a date too” “It could have been him. But no I hope you two have a really nice night together.” “I mean it. A. Really. Nice. Night.”
How relationships work: I like your butt. However, I can notice other butts. They can be nice too. But your butt is my favourite butt. It’s the nicest butt. Because it’s mine. And I can touch it.
indianchiefkeef: old people are either super nice or the meanest people on earth there is no in between
familyfriendlyurl: when i was in grade 3 our class was having a party and i brought in the shrek soundtrack and everyone loved it and the girl i had a crush on winked at me i owe everything to shrek
cherryblossombarrage: brachiosaurs: improbablenormality: caraknightley: puffer fish are so cute when they arent inflated they just look like theyre smiling all the time aw TRY TO PET ME NOW, MOTHERFUCKER! I’m sorry, that was mean. I just wanted to see what you’d do. #the bruce banner of the sea
attractive friend: ugh im so ugly
me: well what the fuck does that make me then
Everyone at my school's idea of a relationship: Someone asks someone "Will you go out with me?" and the other person says yes. They hug in the hallways, hold hands in the morning before the bell rings, and they kiss at lunch. They say "I love you" after two days. The whole school agrees that they are the cutest couple ever and hopes that they will last.
My idea of a relationship: You start talking to each other and is in the "talking stage". One person asks you to go a date with them. You guys go a few more dates. You guys are dating. You guys act like a couple. You hug, you hold hands, you kiss. One person asks you to be their boyfriend/girlfriend. You guys are now officially a couple. You're in one of those relationships where you don't announce it to the whole world but you won't deny it if someone asked. You guys are comfortable around each other, you hang out outside of school. You say "I love you" when the time is right and when you actually mean it.